There is a large part of my life that is not as much of a secret as I would like to think it is.
Some feel pity for me because of it, and some think that I brought it upon myself for allowing it to continue.
SO I have decided to finally discuss it openly.
My husband loves another.
He has spent thousands of dollars trying to keep the relationship going.
He has jeopardized relationships with myself, friends, and family. Really with anyone who doesn’t appreciate or understand the relationship he has with this love.
I have spent countless nights sleeping alone because he is tending to his little extracurricular activity.
Once I even awoke to catch him sneaking out in the middle of the night with the hopes that I wouldn’t even notice he was gone.
Now don’t get me wrong… on occasion, he has invited me to join him on these little adventures, and a few times I have cautiously accepted and joined him. While it was, in an odd way, a little bit more comforting to be included, at the end of the day I was still a supporting role and ended up feeling slightly saddened by the lack of attention I received.
And, in the last month since our first child was born, a beautiful baby boy, he has left us for 2 entire nights to go and tend to this insatiable need of his.
In case I have yet to make this clear… my husband is in love… with fishing.
He is forever on the hunt for the elusive hundred pounda, no matter whom he leaves behind in the process.
Ulua fishing consumes his thoughts and controls his actions. It has even spilled over to affect my immediate family.
During a recent visit, he convinced my baby brother to abandon his 9-month pregnant big sister to go chasing after this pipe dream. And NOW he wants to pass this heartbreaking tradition onto his son. He must be stopped….
Ok in all seriousness, while I do occasionally take a back seat to fishing, it truly makes me happy that my husband has a hobby that he honestly loves.
He doesn’t go out to the bars and clubs to party all night getting wasted, and it doesn’t cost nearly as much as some of the other hobbies he has had in the past (motorcycles specifically… well to be fair it might cost as much or more, but he generously hides that fact from me if it does 😉
So, since we are feeling a lot better these days (one month postpartum, yay!) Friday afternoon I took our baby boy Reef down to the beach to hang out with daddy for a little while as he was setting his poles.
I truly believe that including myself and the baby in this hobby is going to get a bit easier! Since we have a little boy, I hope this will grow to be a family activity that we all enjoy.
I started to imagine Reef helping daddy tie his lines and playing with the tako… And it honestly warmed my heart. It is a wonderful way to teach him about life and death, how to obtain your food from somewhere other than Whole Foods or McDonald’s, and lastly about the beauty and power of the ocean and how to respect it.
I kept Reef bundled up in our carrier while it was a little windy, and got to be close to the ocean again for the first time in almost 2 months. It was really the perfect way to spend a few hours outside with the little man while the Husband got to do something that helps to keep us all sane.
Now if he only caught as much as he fished… ohhhhhh xoxoxoxox
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